Post by Gerard on Feb 14, 2004 23:51:19 GMT -5
This isn't NHL-related nor is it non-hockey so I settled to put it here b/c it's certainly hockey. My 16 yr old played last night in a p/off (of sorts) vs a team in the 3rd game of a best of 3 set-up. The winner would represent the area in the provincial playdowns in Cape Breton.
My son isn't a flashy goal scorer but he's very dependable d-man who has played in plenty of games in the last 11 or so years. As luck would have it it went into OT and they scored the winner while my son was on the ice. He saw himself as a major contributor to the loss as the play came from his side of the ice. What he wasn't able to see was that their 3 forwards had all but stayed up-ice hoping for a pass so that they could score the winner.
As the puck trickled across the line, to the delight of the hometown crowd, my son was devastated like few times I have ever saw him. As he was on the ice, on his hands/knees, I could tell he was crying and, as any father would, my heart was crushed. It's even hard to write about.
Over the next few minutes, while the other team celebrated, he ended up at the other end of the ice staring out past the glass unaware of the handshaking which had begun behind him. But when he turned and saw the ritual that all hockey players accept he joined in on the congratulatory offering. I know he would have rather been anywhere else but at center ice which makes me even more proud of him. He could easily have stayed by the end glass.
My responsibility on the hour+ drive home was not to tell him not to feel his emotions but to help him realize that it takes a whole team to win and a whole team to lose. When you lose you can often take on much of the blame b/c you forget about all the good plays you made and concentrate on the last minute. Maybe that's just human nature.
I will remember my son shaking hands for many years. If he learns nothing from this great game other than sportsmanship he's learned a lesson that he will be able to carry over (in time) to his own children. "What more can I say?? Thanks."[/color]
I originally wrote that thread almost 2 full years ago. And, I do, remember that night well. Especially since his high school team got eliminated tonight by a score of 6-2. They hung in there for a bit but, once they got behind by 3, it was almost impossible. And that means his minor hockey 'career' is done with. He's played for about 13 years. A night I never really ever thought would come but, in my heart I knew it was drawing closer. My son only had 2 penalties tonight which isn't too bad when you consider in the fact he's been to box quite a bit this year. Neither of his penalties had much of an effect on the game. His mother was afraid he was gonna self-destruct yet he didn't. I could see, easily, that twinkle in his eye. There were times when he was no more than 15 feet away. He was enjoying this game and all it had in it. He was relaxed and often chuckled with his teammates on the ice. A few weeks ago I asked Terri why he would be so Jeckyl/Hydish compared to his off-ice personality. She quickly told me one thing: 'He just plays with passion.' And he does. Terri loves his quiet confidence and his desire. And, once he's on the ice, he doesn't ask any quarter and never gives any. He's been belted quite a few times yet he never moaned and groaned. The last few games he had leg troubles but he fought threw it. He consistently plays 1/2 the game and often is on the ice for the entire penalty kill.
All the while knowing many parent's often blamed him for a loss as if last year's record was anything to write home about. Other parents, and his own coaches, were always there ready to chew him out whether it was to his face or not. Yet, he never changed his style one bit with the sole exception of being smarter. He hacked and whacked guys and took it back. In fact, in the last tourney a few weeks back, the game after myself and my ex-wife had a talk with a parent, Matt played a great game and ended up with defensive player of the game. A game in which many of his teammates were getting tossed like rag-dolls and living in the penalty box he never took even a minor penalty. The irony was sweet. Yet, he said he never had one coach come over and say 'Good job.' They love to point the finger at him for negative stuff but the forgot there are two sides to a coin.
He would never look in the stands. Not even to acknowledge a head-nod. No big deal. I often only watched him on the ice even though the puck was nowheres near him. I liked to hear him yelling commands on the ice or taking control of a defensive situation. He has many good hockey qualities that don't get on the scoreboard. He wants the big assignments and has always l-o-v-e-d over-time. Once, when he was about 13, he was involved in one that had teams plays 4-4 for 4 minutes, then 3-3 for 3 minutes. Get it?? He was stil on the ice when it hit 2-2 and then they scored. He loves playing defence. He always, make that ALWAYS goes to the aid of a teammate regardless of score or game situation. And, like most defencemen, will go nutzo on you if your hittin' his goalie. Hanson Brothers hockey.
I don't know how to end this as i've had a few 'pops' and more tired than I thought. I'm just glad my kid has made it to another level in life. That night a few years ago was the building block for his attitude tonight. He was putting things in perspective. He's a mature 18 year old who seems confident that, in life, things will eventually, work out for the best. I'm glad that hockey has been a part of that process. "He shoots, he scores!!" Whatta phrase. ;D
My son isn't a flashy goal scorer but he's very dependable d-man who has played in plenty of games in the last 11 or so years. As luck would have it it went into OT and they scored the winner while my son was on the ice. He saw himself as a major contributor to the loss as the play came from his side of the ice. What he wasn't able to see was that their 3 forwards had all but stayed up-ice hoping for a pass so that they could score the winner.
As the puck trickled across the line, to the delight of the hometown crowd, my son was devastated like few times I have ever saw him. As he was on the ice, on his hands/knees, I could tell he was crying and, as any father would, my heart was crushed. It's even hard to write about.
Over the next few minutes, while the other team celebrated, he ended up at the other end of the ice staring out past the glass unaware of the handshaking which had begun behind him. But when he turned and saw the ritual that all hockey players accept he joined in on the congratulatory offering. I know he would have rather been anywhere else but at center ice which makes me even more proud of him. He could easily have stayed by the end glass.
My responsibility on the hour+ drive home was not to tell him not to feel his emotions but to help him realize that it takes a whole team to win and a whole team to lose. When you lose you can often take on much of the blame b/c you forget about all the good plays you made and concentrate on the last minute. Maybe that's just human nature.
I will remember my son shaking hands for many years. If he learns nothing from this great game other than sportsmanship he's learned a lesson that he will be able to carry over (in time) to his own children. "What more can I say?? Thanks."[/color]
I originally wrote that thread almost 2 full years ago. And, I do, remember that night well. Especially since his high school team got eliminated tonight by a score of 6-2. They hung in there for a bit but, once they got behind by 3, it was almost impossible. And that means his minor hockey 'career' is done with. He's played for about 13 years. A night I never really ever thought would come but, in my heart I knew it was drawing closer. My son only had 2 penalties tonight which isn't too bad when you consider in the fact he's been to box quite a bit this year. Neither of his penalties had much of an effect on the game. His mother was afraid he was gonna self-destruct yet he didn't. I could see, easily, that twinkle in his eye. There were times when he was no more than 15 feet away. He was enjoying this game and all it had in it. He was relaxed and often chuckled with his teammates on the ice. A few weeks ago I asked Terri why he would be so Jeckyl/Hydish compared to his off-ice personality. She quickly told me one thing: 'He just plays with passion.' And he does. Terri loves his quiet confidence and his desire. And, once he's on the ice, he doesn't ask any quarter and never gives any. He's been belted quite a few times yet he never moaned and groaned. The last few games he had leg troubles but he fought threw it. He consistently plays 1/2 the game and often is on the ice for the entire penalty kill.
All the while knowing many parent's often blamed him for a loss as if last year's record was anything to write home about. Other parents, and his own coaches, were always there ready to chew him out whether it was to his face or not. Yet, he never changed his style one bit with the sole exception of being smarter. He hacked and whacked guys and took it back. In fact, in the last tourney a few weeks back, the game after myself and my ex-wife had a talk with a parent, Matt played a great game and ended up with defensive player of the game. A game in which many of his teammates were getting tossed like rag-dolls and living in the penalty box he never took even a minor penalty. The irony was sweet. Yet, he said he never had one coach come over and say 'Good job.' They love to point the finger at him for negative stuff but the forgot there are two sides to a coin.
He would never look in the stands. Not even to acknowledge a head-nod. No big deal. I often only watched him on the ice even though the puck was nowheres near him. I liked to hear him yelling commands on the ice or taking control of a defensive situation. He has many good hockey qualities that don't get on the scoreboard. He wants the big assignments and has always l-o-v-e-d over-time. Once, when he was about 13, he was involved in one that had teams plays 4-4 for 4 minutes, then 3-3 for 3 minutes. Get it?? He was stil on the ice when it hit 2-2 and then they scored. He loves playing defence. He always, make that ALWAYS goes to the aid of a teammate regardless of score or game situation. And, like most defencemen, will go nutzo on you if your hittin' his goalie. Hanson Brothers hockey.
I don't know how to end this as i've had a few 'pops' and more tired than I thought. I'm just glad my kid has made it to another level in life. That night a few years ago was the building block for his attitude tonight. He was putting things in perspective. He's a mature 18 year old who seems confident that, in life, things will eventually, work out for the best. I'm glad that hockey has been a part of that process. "He shoots, he scores!!" Whatta phrase. ;D
